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Impression on the wafer of time, with the light of practicality, and firmness of age.

Hiding beneath the shadow of the doubt under the scorching sun of reality  are my dreams…….

Waiting to be rescued someday sometime…..

Enhanced version of the word taught and embedded in my mind………

Is it true the only way to be a thoughtless mind is by accepting the world over you………

With numbness riding on my nerve a courageous step forward……..

Forces me to take two back in precaution………..

Resistance from within, resistance from outside a never-ending

debate on which words are futile.

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Everyone at any point of given time have an idol. An image to inspire and motivate him/her to be someone better, stronger, or rather to be something in life and that’s good for a fact. Though its strange how obnoxiously ignoring we can be when it comes to these people we admire and look up to. We might think that there is nothing or no one better than they are but is it true ? or are we just closing our eyes by our own choice towards the fact that there exist nothing like that(human nature lol).

Dreams

Dreams (Photo credit: hufse)

For a long time i knew a man who was, and is still my idol, but things started to change lately. I got a wonderful opportunity to be with him for certain time period. Up close to him was my dream but during that period I realized many a things and and many of my believes were shattered. Naive and immature for me he was the perfect man strong, intelligent, compassionate, a perfect picture of freedom and intelect. But things change when you observe things closely and when you have an addiction of putting people under a microscope things can turn out to be pretty repulsive.

The cracks in the personality and character might not be known to you. Nobody is good as perfect its just the way we imagine them the streak of insanity or the cliche is always there.

it’s true you actually want to know a person then you have to live with them. Cause the truth remains the same when you look and observe a person you are actually learning about the personality they “want” you to know and learn about. Yes, its like if you actually see how they keep the delicious chicken you just had at KFC you might not want to have it again.

For a person who calls himself introvert and independent from mortgage of emotion, claiming salvation inside the fort of self-indulgence, keeping his eye tight shut, I seem to be carrying too much baggage. On an instance talking to a f(r)iend I realized that I might to be to obtuse and helplessly been trying to differ from world, where i am nothing different from any other constructive piece of it.

Being assertive and still exploring the unresolved concepts of life, freedom, love, hope and all, I have cataloged life in many chapters and under the index biggest volume is of constantly changing definitions of human concept in different circumstances. But then talking to my f(r)iend Angie I realized for both of us that part of index is quite similar or rather i feel for most of us are. What changes is not the definition but our own personal interpretation of the circumstance and the word we choose to define things under different obligations at the moment.

 

 

 

I tried to formulate a different prospective to withdraw my mind and tried to define things on my own at that time defining love with her by different means but i was actually pretty distracted remembering the incident we both shared though circumstantially different………………….   

Time seem to have stopped for a minute and that minute seemed as eternity. The mind seems to have entered some un-constructed multidimensional dream space and the life so light like a thought with its own wings floating around like a leaf on a stream of time. And time seem to have stopped for him/her in his/her arms.

Time seem to have stopped for a minute it seemed that the minute will last for eternity. Though he/she walked away from the place but his/her soul was torn apart and a part of it was left there in that moment forever. Trapped under the solemn silence of his/her, screaming in his/her ears deafening bolted to ground forever.

Redefining the time, life, love, hate, freedom circumstantially.

Bleeding(maybe in love)

It is just too hard to define what i feel…….

Cold, dark and dead.

Lost in ecastasy in dark, cause here I dont have to see my face.

Not to face others, what is hard is to face myself.

Rotten, a corps in tattered, lying in the cold grave.

Sleeping. Sleeping with the craw;ers but ignoring them.

what is good, is how, they suck on me.

My blood.

What is good, is how, they feed on me.

My flesh.

 

Gone i want it and myself gone, toxic, perforated disgusted I am.

Is it me ? Is it me still inside ??

Entrapped am I, in inside what, I don’t know, what.

Bright and pure but dirtied. Dirtied by me and myself…………

 

your promises

following a streak of dreams in night

i have managed to realize a thousand lies

but denying a simple truth i move on forward towards the same.

plastic origin of a thoughtless ming flickering and weak

all those promises you made me in the sweet spring

today lies under ice betrayed…………..

in my life winter walked in and it has been long but the winter stays.

lost among the morbid reality i have just one realization 

that anything true is just a second face of lie …………..

and i hope you may find what you were searching in these lines just right infront of your eyes

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